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“I want to get married, and I have to… but I can’t.” This is the 38-year-old single man’s worry and is what most single men in Korea worry about in this day of an age.
He is good looking, tall (178cm) and graduated from a well-known university in Seoul and is now a manager at a major company and makes over 80 million won yearly.
This makes him a pretty good catch for many ladies however he still is so concerned about his marriage.
“In Korea, the cost of marriage is too high, and the burden is more on men. But I couldn’t save much for marriage so far for various reasons and I don’t think I can prepare enough funds for my marriage so soon."
The reason why he said “I want to get married, but I can’t” is because of the cost of marriage.
He is capable and has a bright future, so he can save money from now however, he is worried because he doesn’t have enough money saved as of now. Is he unable to get married? Are there any women who wants to marry a guy like him?
It has been a long time since the cost of marriage became an issue for couples who wish to get married and their parents in Korea. Who provides a house and who pays for the wedding and dowry etc. can be a very touchy subject.
Usually, conflicts arise because one person expects the other person to pay for certain things. Wedding ceremony, rehearsal, engagement party, honeymoon trip etc. The conflict gets worse when the custom and tradition kicks in.
I know a person who got her daughter married and her mother in-law insisted that the bride prepares Korean traditional dress Hanbok for the groom and his parents, and the groom prepares Hanbok for the bride and her mother only. So, the bride’s father had to prepare his own Hanbok.
This sounds a little unfair and that resulted in souring the relationship between the two families prior to their marriage.
You can’t get engaged, married or go on a honeymoon alone but how come people like to split costs into everything? Not sure who this custom or tradition is for.
More people worry about not being able to get married, but those people weren’t like that from the beginning. They have changed when they face the reality of what it takes to get married so as a result, they decide to say maybe get married in their next life. Frankly, men would love to receive some help from women however, it is hard for men to ask to women for help.
If you want to see some breakthrough, you need to compromise something. Men can be more open to older women who are more stable financially then they can help each other to prepare for their marriage.
When you go grocery shopping, often, you exceed your budget. Even if you prepare a shopping list, you end up buying something unplanned. Marriage is just like that. It is impossible to prepare 100%. You start with 50% and work together to complete 100%.
Couple.net CEO | WoongJin Lee
♥ Since 1991, Couple.net ♥
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